I cut you off after you tried to do a shot out of a neti pot, down your nose.
explains the nose bleeds.
I just realized there's an entire generation of children that will never know Alex Trebek had a mustache... Sad.
The cab driver thought we were passed out so he called a sexline...
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
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i told him I'd let him eat part of a weed cookie out of my cleavage, so he pulled over like a gentleman.
Why am I not blowing coke off your ass at my apartment?
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
also I saw his dick in the morning light and it was glorious. Like staring upon your birthday cake you ordered from heaven and going " can't wait to eat that later"
Well let me fuck you while I make potatoes. It's every girls dream
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His boxer smelled like clean laundry while I was giving him head. It was delightful, like sucking a dick in a spring meadow.
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
He said that we couldn't refer to each other as brother and sister anymore cuz we were in no way related and he would love nothing more than to get naked with me.
11:30pm - Shots together. 12:15pm Shots together. 12:45pm Shots together. 9:30am Plan B's together.
Is it totally acceptable to fuck a co-worker even though we don't speak the same language?
Why do you even have to ask me that question
aloe plants are like gummy bears with an exoskeleton, but with healing powers instead of deliciousness.
are you on the drugs???
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