So are we goin out tonight?
Dude, we woke up in your car in some parking lot last night...
And that was fun, wasn't it?
I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
New Jersey isn't a real state, it's just a myth you tell little kids to scare them like Canada or Carrot Top
I should do something nice for her. Like sign her up for "What Not To Wear."
I was just on craigslist and saw and ad for a naked yoga instructor. I will no longer be jobless.
I found out why they kept calling her "CD". It was short for "Crab Dip". You're fucked.
YOU CAN'T BASE A RELATIONSHIP OFF A PENIS
I LIKE HIS TONGUE TOO.
If I win the contest of drinking the most water I get a chicken nugget.
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
It all started because he put my damn phone in his pants. By his crotch nonetheless.
Just accidentally flashed my junk to the lady helping me try on suits, it was cold in there, I don't think she was impressed.
You declared that afternoon sex will be referred to as "wet naps" from now on
I brought her cheeseburgers and tequila but she's still mad at me.
You've had it in your mouth, how have you not seen it?
Randomize
