i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
he asked me if i "normally slept like that" because i was curled up in a ball facing the wall. then he told me that i woke up in the middle of the night and said "oh my god. i forgot you were here." how did he not understand that i didn't want him in my bed.
I wonder what a non-hungover friday at work is like
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
Just found a ramen cup in the stall and all of the showers running with no one in them. WHERE ARE YOU?
When he came downstairs he looked at me like I was attempting to rob his house.
Did you reintroduce yourself?
He threatened to call the cops.
I broke up with him in the bar & then asked him if he wanted to have a contest to see who gets the most numbers. I say I took that break up well
six ambien and a bong later...he was calling me blueberry princess who need rescuing from the evil oven, and he was sir Eatsalot.
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
Guess who just got a Christian Beliefs class to seriously discuss the spiritual implications of dolphin rape?
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
Visions of polite missionary are dancing in my head right now kinda and it alarms me
You know it's really hard to draft fantasy football players in a crowded bar when I have a raging hard on
I don't know if the puke on my pants is mine or not
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
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