Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
it was like brushing your tongue but with a fucking long toothbrush.
Plus apparently whenever one of her friends loses their virginity they get a party with a funfetti cake which I found funny
I woke up in your car in the McDonalds parking lot. What the hell happened to 'no man left behind'?
I brought him to this party even though we're not together anymore because we made a bet on who would have sex first, and it is a sausage fest up in here.
We didn't have a blender for the margaritas, so she tried to use the garbage disposal and wasted half a handle of my grandpa's good tequila.
It started with jello shots. It ended with tears.
I literally got so drunk last night, I texted myself "porpoises" and that was it. I have no recollection of this.
I'm too drunk to explain this to you. It's too hard.
I threw up in the shower. I cleaned it all up and there is on mess at all. This hangover has become borderline religous. Powerful and life changing.
either he just commented on my nose ring or he's offering me cocaine, I honestly can't tell
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
I am now banned from the bar... Because you got head from my ex in the woman's restroom
He's a security blanket. A security blanket who FUCKS.
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