he was walking around the bar drinking wild turkey and gobbling simultaneously
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
oh my god. i just found my camera... on top of the bush outside of my house. never let me drink everclear again
Well we were just driving down the street, there was a realtor and a couple walking up the porch of a house for sale, mark sticks his head out, opens his mouth to say something, pukes all down the side of the car, pauses, and yells "THIS IS A PHENOMAL NEIGHBORHOOD YOURE GONNA LOVE IT"
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Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
running the faucet water is not hiding the sound of you vomiting. fyi.
Just because I tried to backhand you with a fist full of cash does not make me violent
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
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if a CSI technician examined our hotel room with a black light he'd think we hit the Pulse button a DNA blender without a lid
I almost had sex in a public restroom last night in case you're wondering how much of a mess 22 is for me
SOME DUDE PUT OUT FOR A MCCHICKEN AND YET YOU STILL WON'T FUCK ME
Pretty sure I got pink eye from the strip club. There is also still beer cans rattling around in my shower.
I feel fine lol. I tried climbing a tree but the branch broke and I got arrested.
and then she sorta stared at me like "holy shit" and I looked down and my dog was licking her ass
Ruff night.
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