remember facepaint boy? turns out it stains. aaaand i have it all over my face and neck.
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
I just had a formal request to dress as a boyscout for my meeting with Legal on Friday. From Legal. Time to go home.
All I know is she had me sitting on the kitchen floor with her little Pomeranian eating potato chips And shredded cheese. I don't even know dude. I don't even know.
Well anything after a French guy would have been a disappointment. But I'm fairly certain he was just trying to masturbate into me.
Sunshine is the equivalent of sprinkling whore pellets on campus.
Anderson Cooper just came out.
Crying tears of glitter and rainbows right now. Gonna decorate my dildo like My Little Pony in his honor.
I really like her...she always overpays me for xanax and still feels the need to fuck me to make up for it....
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
Apparently being drunk on a southwest flight and yelling "TURNUP" during take off is looked down upon in this state.
So tomorrow I have my performance review with my boss who I banged. When I go in should I ask if this review will be rating my sex or work performance?
You know you're doing well in life when weed is considered to improve your job performance
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
Dude I used amphetamines responsibly today though. I snorted one in the am for work and then chewed one in the pm for other work. I'm an adult.
He fingerfucked me in the hot tub and then we had sex in the wine cellar. See thats why I like partying with rich people
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