I'm not looking forward to the waking up early part. Or actually the wedding part. Or the reception part. But I am looking forward to the meaningless sex with some random guy I meet at the reception part.
It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
i am only reminding you that showing off your fellatio skills on vegetables is probably not an appropriate party trick
TLC. RIGHT NOW. PRIMORDIAL TODDLERS.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Does slim fast make a chocolate heart for valentines? If so that's what she's getting.
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
I have beard burns on my inner thighs. I'd say last night went pretty well.
On the plus side this hangover is the tipping point that finally convinced my lazy ass to get some sunglasses.
someone just drove by blasting livin on a prayer and threw like 6 bagels out the window... was it you?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
His 21st birthday is in the middle of shark week, it's meant to be.
You know being hammered seven days in a row can do serious damage to your liver.
Text me on Monday and make sure I'm still alive
If you could watch a water balloon run... That's what it's like watching her run.
And now you know why we call him Three-Balls Brad
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
You made the lady who made your cheeseburger sign the box so that when she got famous you would have her autograph.
Randomize