you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
its like an ocean threw up right in your lap
his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
just spent the last 4 hours searching ex-girlfriend porn to make sure there are no photos of me
He came over while I was in the ER and hung pictures of himself around my house.
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
Woke up on the kitchen floor cuddling with the dummy we made of you. Hope your internship is going well.
He told me I was 100% better then porn then passed out nto the cake
He pissed on a police station. Then expected to not be arrested. Sounds accurate.
I think were only still together so we can make each other miserable
I was lying I actually don't, I hope a reindeer shitted in her bed
I feel like sleeping with foreign people is a long term investment. It's like a time share. Now when I go to London I have a place to stay.
What has my life become? I'be officially recruited my fuck buddy for help getting my ex back.
I just took like 30 condoms from the doctors office... no one can say I don't try to save my money.
he's trapped himself under a bed and is screaming at a robot dog to give him a blowjob
Randomize
