I must be too annoying 4 u.
i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
why do cheetos always look like penises
So I had a Liz Lemon moment today....went to Chipotle to get my "cheer me up" burrito bowl for the 4th time this week and the chipotle guy sighed and said always the same huh?
What's the appropriateness of putting a 50 cent lyric in my gmas eulogy?
Just consider it? What else do you have going on today that could be as awesome as a day full of lord of the rings and sex?
I am not exagerating when I say the thought "screw you future me" actually just went through my head
The people at subway are so judgy when you stop to get a sandwhich on your walk of shame
Part of me really wants this picture, but the other part of me knows if he is really this drunk, he could be sodomizing a lamp and not know it
It takes a special kind of Adderall to make me go to the hardware store, buy paint, and paint tiny polka-dots on all four of my bedroom walls.
I just wish I had a snapshot of his attempted front flip off the bar. There are some things that are worth getting a life ban for, and the moment of impact with his foot and that lady's face was one of those things.
Even blacked out me knows not to sleep with socks on
Woke up with an entire pizza face down in my bed beside me... untouched. Never beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
I was singing Colors of the Wind and swigging vodka and still felt like more of an adult.
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