Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
Remember how we wr so drunk last nite we cldnt find whr i shot my load? ...found some of it.
I bought a Christmas tree in my drunken state last night, after walking a half mile in search of vino and prior to my apparently playing boardgames with my boyfriend's family. There is no way you are on my level.
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
some guy just walked up to the bench i was on, backflipped off of it, gave me his number and walked away....i love this city
The future queen of Norway was pregnant with a druglord's baby when she met the prince. We still have hope.
We're going to catch a squirrel this summer
Babies are disgusting. I held one once. Then I washed my hands and rinsed my mouth out with wine.
Trustme, don't ever look up when you're giving road head. It's awkward.
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
It's 4/20 and I spent the morning in the gym and am working later tonight. I don't even have any weed. Why am I adult-ing again?
I accidentally left my shirt at my booty calls house. He washed it & hung it up for me in his closet. I can't decide if that's sweet or creepy
So, just how hungover are you?
Not at all, surprisingly.
That has to be your X-Men power.
I just want to eat chicken fingers and drink beer and smoke in bed with my laptop so I can watch Netflix
So your not doing THAT great with the break up then...
Randomize
