I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
I just finished washing your number off of my chest. I'm Bryan by the way.
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
After New Year's Eve I will be hibernating my life away. Only wake me up for skiing, schnapps, and sex. In that order.
He thought I was flirting with him but really I just needed someone to hold me up.
Is "you left your socks here, please come get them" a good way of saying "come fuck me?"
What drink are we having for lunch?
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
Yea we just broke up
so do we start sexting now or later?
It was the hardest I ever came in my life and once I could see straight again I just looked at him and said "cool"
I recall trading my iPhone watch for a carton of Marlboros.
She wants to have a threesome with Taylor Swift. I think this is the kind of love my grandparents spoke of.
Oh yeah, it was definitely the best sex of my life, I just don't think I can fix the kitchen table before my parents get back...
I thought he was a lobster and that the moon was going to pull me through him.
I don't think I should try acid.
Randomize
