oh god the rape fog is back!
this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
At least you're going to bed with all the teeth you woke up with
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
he also begged me to fake an orgasm when he couldn't get me to come.
i'll just tell him I slept with them both because we needed to compare notes
New development. Drinking at work is so easy and awesome I might have to do it everyday.
They got me high and left me at the mall with a giftcard for $400. I need an adult.
The amount of precision it takes to urinate into a 2 liter bottle while hammered is undeniably difficult.
I can't remember much from that party after we snapchatted my dancing boobs to all of her contacts
My very favorite thing in the whole world is when guys try to booty call her as I'm fucking her. Sucks to suck.
If you're funny as hell and have a mustache, odds are I'm probably gonna fuck you
He said his fantasy involved both of us fucking while stuffed into the same overalls
He called me for phone sex. Do you know how hard it is to fake an orgasm, and play Candy Crush at the same time?
I don’t know how to sext. What do you say? What do you don’t say?
Just start quoting WAP lyrics.
Randomize
