she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
During sex he wiggled his hips and said "I'm turning the ice cream" Deal breaker?
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
you looked up at me mid puke with tears in your eyes and asked to make sure no one took your turn at Wii
I just used an app to identify a song that was playing in the background of a porno. May god bless your soul steve jobs.
i was on the fence about his sexual orientation until he referred to his marlboro loghts as "carrie bradshaws"
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
dont worry it didnt get any better. she locked herself in his room and was screaming at the top of her lungs "IM GUNA PEE ON YOUR BED"
Taking back a box of condoms is possibly the most depressing thing i've ever done
The doctor asked me what height I fell from to hurt my back.. I answered keg height
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
Sushi was just eaten off my naked body. I feel like I can die in peace now.
My roommate definitely just walked in on me playing the piano naked.
By piano you mean.....
Like literally a piano.
Ohhhh that's kind of embarrassing.
The only thing left on my Bucket List is getting fingered at an aquarium.
there is a guy with a glowstick staff outside my house
Randomize
