I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
I've decided to bang my pen-pal.
My dad assaulted a TSA agent this morning. Shut down airport security. Don't tell me that your family is embarrassing.
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
Please tell me that text was part of your elaborate Brett Favre costume; otherwise, dude, wtf?
Two penises later: I might be straighter than I think.
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
I just want you to know that we eye fucked the shit out of someone who just got drafted
We tried to hook you up with a girl but you said you'd rather fuck the large muscular black man because "At least he'd be tight". He was the bouncer, he heard you.
My mother just made an innapropriate gesture with a cucumber while grocery shopping at whole foods... Then she said "bitches love cucumbers" and all this time i thought i was adopted
There's a whistle here and I just want to play my whistle song on it.
He snapchated me a photo of his penis with the caption "it needs a home".
you just have the mind of an innocent, non-tainted child.
YOU KNOW THAT'S BULLSHIT BECAUSE YOU'RE THE REASON IT'S BULLSHIT
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
I bought two pregnancy tests and a cosmopolitan magazine at 4am... I told the cashier "dont judge me, ur not God"
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