i wish starbucks made bloody marys
There could not be a more unattractive person. She just told me her period was so bad that she got sick. I think my penis retracted and killed himself
We're not too concerned with getting her out of jail. We're on a mission for donuts.
she peed on how many people?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
promise me that when we are 32, we will look nothing like Kim Zolciak. Promise me right this instant.
the paramedics asked what clubs id be in next weekend so they can plan ahead.
Tonight, a friend walked in and said "oh look at that. Drunk on the living room floor. Just as expected." this is my life. This is my life.
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Monday funday. I brushed my teeth with antibacterial soap. hangover I did not have.
No he can't come. I swear to gods he's "Why We Can't Have Nice Things" given physical form.
It's not stalking if you do it on LinkedIn...
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
got laid for being an eagle scout again. 4 more and ill have all my merit badges.
we had to take 10 shots sometime before midnight, then 11 shots between midnight and 1. so yes its gonna be a rough day.
Randomize