PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
Its the little things i like about bein home like having actual toilet paper instead of subway napkins
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
I did the crab walk everywhere because I was drunk enough that it was easier than standing up.
Pregaming before going to drink with a girl from Russia. Please make sure I'm not dead in the morning.
It was a taxi full of fist pumps and chanting to "face down, ass up". It was that 1% that makes my job worth it.
He was twisted. Literally. It's like God took his dick with a pair of pliers and gave it a half twist to the left.
How was the picnic?
We played softball, except our team sucked. In one hand was a mitt, the other a beer.
Why didn't you put them down?
No beer left behind.
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
The number of threesomes I have agreed to seems to increase every time I talk to you drunk...
He responded to all of my texts prodding for dirty talk with "I will do anything you are comfortable with."\n\nChivalry is great, but being comfortable doesn't get me wet.
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
I'm still thinking about that amazing orgasm last night. I literally heard angels singing "Hallelujah!!"
Randomize
