Best porno line to date...."drinks are on me..." while she female ejaculates into a wine chalice
Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
Learn some fucking English or leave me alone! "Your" is for something that belongs to you, like 'your herpes'. And "you're" is a contraction for "you are", like "you're not sleeping with me".
I think a girl in front of me glued an ugg tag to a weird pair of boots.
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
Omg!!!! Call me in the morning I just saw A stripper queef out a dollar
I woke up to the sound of gentle rain, only to realize I was laying under a urine trough in the men's restroom. Fuck you, bourbon. Fuck you.
Yepp, I had to be the one to explain that the girl who was slapping people in the face with a dildo was my drunk girlfriend.
It makes me really sad that some people start their saturdays running or biking instead of with 3 shots of tequila, a sausage biscuit, freaks & geeks and 2 orgasms.
That's why god made go-pro's and tequila
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
Unless you count my weekly workout where I drink wine, listen to obscure/cheesy records, and pretend I'm a ballerina...no. I don't exercise.
Nothing like casual arson to brighten your day
He fucked the hangover right out of me. That good.
But I think I successfully seduced her with my alias.
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