Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
you could play connect the dots with the people ive fucked in this room
Come over! I've just turned Titanic into a drinking game. I drink every time I want to fuck Leonardo DiCaprio.
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
Was there a Canadian at your party or did I dream that?
All you need to know is that isn't jizz
So I have a scar from when the stripper tore off my underwear .... Best birthday ever
i came so hard i kicked through my windshield
I want to show up to tomorrow's study group looking like I got hit by a train. A train made of dicks.
HE JUST ALLUDED TO FUCKING MY FRESH LOAF OF BREAD
Had to snap chat three different people to ask who left the bite mark on my thigh. All three said "Wasn't me". Now I can't wear a bathing suit to my mom's pool.
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
look when god gives you a dick that good for his son's birthday you don't question it
i stood outside in the bushes for thirty minutes. Do you know how many drunk guys pee in bushes at 2 am?
fucked one of the teachers, librarian job's going great
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