spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
don't bother texting me at 10. my pants WILL be off and I'm not putting them back on to come see you.
is there an easy way to say "i didnt plan on sleeping with you until i saw how drunk you were" ?
and when he finished he started shouting "swim boys SWIM"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
we literally hit three floors of our apartment building searching for condoms. also got macaroni.
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
just puked a little into my hand/sleeve. way too hungover for the first day of class
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She said " I'm going to get her back one day soon for putting extacy in my pop while I drove her to whislter" just a heads up.
I wish there was an emoji to express our Eskimo Brothership
Also I'm at the pub and there are old lady pirates gyrating on a pole. I wish you were here.
I'm good. We walked you back to my apartment and you demanded to eat the sandwich I made for him
I want my tombstone to read "making poor life decisions since 1993"
Dick is healthier for you than green beans
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