It was kinda weird being the boss
Did you feel like Tony Danza?
We fucked twice, I went to the bathroom to freshen up, and came back to him playing "Your Body is A Wonderland" on his guitar naked in my bed.
We're so high we're finding things in the room to build a submarine with. So far we have two cardboard boxes, a piece of wood, puffy paint, and an empty bottle to use as a periscope.
all i wanna do is slam about 38 beers eat a whole pizza and wake up naked in the taco bell parking lot
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i knew he was a douchebag when his facebook activities were "ladeis," and "gettin crunk wit ladeis"
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
We started snorting MDMA at 3 in the afternoon...it was never going to end well.
Yeah well my vagina has expectations too but they don't get met all the time.
how are you shocked you fucked her? sure shes hot, but she also washed your beerpong balls in her mouth..... you should probably get tested.
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She told me I made the cut, and to write my name and number on the white board by the door. I was the 7th number down.
Im fairly sure two chicks roofied me last night. Suckers. I love free drugs.
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
And he's back on taking these stupid testosterone supplements to kickstart him back into working out. And they just make him angry and horny all the time. I'm like great, just in time to meet my whole family for Christmas.
I don't think it's ever a good night if I'm this hung over and I didn't even get an orgasm out of the deal...
I just had 3 numbers I don't know text me and remind me I am to attend AA on monday. Im gonna say it was a good night.
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