One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
Somewhere between the 30 minutes of cunnilingus, the improvised song about the Olympics, and the super thoughtful shower beer... I knew I married the right guy
My vagina loves me do-dah do-dah my vagina loves me do-dah do-dah
I picture you throwing your vagina around in the same fashion that they pass out candy at a parade.
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I'm at the bar, forgot my pants. Everyone's over reacting
You can't honestly expect me to maintain an erection when you have the Glen Beck show on
I just kept hitting the drum to get thru the crowd to the bar. Surprisingly it worked
He stopped me in the middle of a blow job to call his grandma for her birthday.
At least he has family values.
It is 5:00PM and I'm just now putting on underwear.
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Nothing says "I'm sorry for shitting in your bed" like an Olive Garden gift card
You fell out of his top bunk onto his set of golf clubs. After seeing blood on your leg, you proceeded to sing "the first cut is the deepest" while sprawled on the golf clubs
How hot? Like... how many hemsworths?
I was so drunk, he put me to bed and went down stairs to hang out with his friends. Apparently, I was curled up in the closet, spooning the dresser when he came back up.
Just used the word fistfucking in a serious conversation with my professor in front of the class, while making an appropriate and valid point. Win.
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
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