We named our party play list daddy issues
these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
i was so high last night while i was driving i felt like i was riding a bike with no pedals
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
He was sitting cross legged outside his tent repeatedly hitting the ground with a hammer and shouting 'this.is.a.good.idea.'
i'm sitting pantsless eating potato chips and watching porn before he picks me up for our date. I hope he's ready for this...
Just orgasmed in canada. I should get a sticker or something that says I orgasmed in a different country.
maybe volvos are so family friendly and safe because they're extremely uncomfortable to get fucked on.
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
It's not even 11, i dropped a shot glass, nick is bleeding, and everyone is drunk
My stuff that was at your place last night smells like doughnuts. I'm not even mad.
My desire to pee is a lot higher than my need to be buzzed right now.
Well, if you're anything like me you'll get a lot of ass when you turn 30, so that's a plus
It was a simpler time. With fewer STDs.
Randomize
