So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
I just watched a girl in the library pull a vodka bottle out of her bag. I think I'm going to give her my number.
Also, the zoloft kicked in and I can't get an erection anymore. So I'm depressed.
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
I wasn't half as drunk as u but u were saying u were a "worm" and u tried to slither out of my grasp
I made friends with the delivery guy because he had beautiful dread locks and was a Zelda fan. He texted me after he left saying he wasn't trying to be creepy but we should be friends. We're hanging out tomorrow.
How does this kind of shit happen to you?!
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
Is it bad that I'm using the photo I took for my fake ID as my linkedin profile pic?
she walked up to me at the bar, kissed me, andthen declared "I HAVEN'T SEEN YOU OR YOUR PENIS SINCE 2011."
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
Why r u in my phone under "the last survivor"?
Remember when you brought a guy home from the bar... to our parents house.... on thanksgiving eve?
Party bus got out of hand. Some guy pissed himself. Later, he couldn't find his house keys, so he kicked the back door in.
tell him if he brings over dinner you might let him see your left boob...or right, whichever you prefer. But under no circumstances do you let him see both...unless he brings a good desert...like coffee ice cream or something
Randomize
