put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
i just found a bag of weed behind my capital one card. i guess that's what's in my wallet.
The kid taped his penis down so that he wouldn't get a boner while dancing with girls. Oh these middle school man whores never cease to amaze me.
I fucking, woke up on a couch with a towel as a blanket to someones lion king ringtone.
This Girl Got Ghosted By Her BF Of 5 Years While On A Trip They Took For Her Birthday
A man and his most likely hooker just bought us Taco Bell.
Her vagina was like a painting you can put your face in.
Literally just one second of unclenched butt hole away from shitting my pants.
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
Made up a full house drinking game
On my way.
People Are Applauding Chrissy Teigen For Getting Candid About Breast-Pumping
I refused to call him anything but Drake eyebrows all night.
Dude, i just watched a drag queen dropkick a motherfucker. this is a good night.
we turned the lights off and all you could see were my glow in the dark stars and his penis
How many Wendy's frosties do you think it would take to fill a bathtub?
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
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