Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

(207): View more from Maine

I think we should see other people.

(1-207): View more from Maine

Already working on it.

Fav 12 6297 1893
share tweet
(310): View more from California

it felt like a thousand fairies were licking my balls.

Fav 30 10880 1324
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(773): View more from Illinois

You're such a slut.

(318): View more from Louisiana

I prefer opportunist.

Fav 27 6930 1386
share tweet
(631): View more from New York

It's official. Every single female in their late teens and early 20s get their fb statuses from a pool of cliched "quotes" which all say, without saying, "boys treat me like shit, I know they do, but one day I'll find 'the guy' who will treat me right no matter how psychotic I am." Vom.

Fav 48 6777 2248
share tweet
27 Signs That Someone Will Probably Be Bad At Sex
Read it at the TFLN blog
(908): View more from New Jersey

It honestly wasnt my fault this time. i was in shock. WHO THE FUCK OWNS A PEACOCK?!

Fav 20 8289 1342
share tweet
(585): View more from New York

i feel like words won't express my appreciation properly so at some point i'm just going to bring you pizza then go down on you for an hour. fair?

Fav 32 11211 1484
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(952): View more from Minnesota

Was rudely woken up by strangers at 4:15am. I was leaning against the stoplight at 9th

Fav 5 2971 1311
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(603): View more from New Hampshire

It's a good cause. For your vagina.

Fav 5 1217 1024
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(928): View more from Arizona

Well, I woke up on a roll-away, with a knot in the back of my head and penis confetti stuck to me. Also, I apparently literally gave the shirt off my back right before I passed out, so I was topless. Vegas won this trip.

Fav 3 723 358
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT