a hangover this bad deserves a feeding tube
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
there is no 'pace myself' on the blackout express
You know you stopped at a liquor store to prepare for a 12-year-old's birthday party, right?
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
Your cousin just asked the bartender to start a round of vagina shots. Not body shots. Vagina shots. We're taking her out more often.
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
I see your creepy poodle photo and raise you a shirtless elderly gentleman who looks like a yetti in cutoffs who may or may not have an ENORMOUS erection.
.... touche....
Can I just skip the lesson I have planned for tomorrow and just teach my students about Prohibition using my impending hangover?
This is why american education is failing
All I know is when I checked my phone this morning google translate was open with "help the cow ate my robot" translated to French
I made out with a guy because he ate a grape lollipop and he tasted delicious... not my proudest moment.
You must take up my position now. You must pass out in awkward places as I taught you... Sears a hotel elevator and Burger King bathroom. You potential for greater young grasshopper.
Who the fuck is "nick from the beach last year"
No idea hahaha...why?
He just texted me.. Should I ask where I met him?
Leave it to my mom and I to turn the hearing into a drinking game.
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