u ever jackoff with ur legs spread and pretend ur fuckin urself as a girl and get mad u'll never know what that feels like. Or to fly like a bird?
Did u absorb a fraternal twin in the womb?
i used baking grease as lip gloss
Buying $100 worth of beef jerkey sounded like a terrific idea last night.
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
Sitting in a bubble bath with my bong, how's your morning?
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
for a while, i completely forgot that you wrote "fuck me" on my stomach before we went out. when he took my shirt off that night, he just looked down and said, "may i?". i think i'm in love
Check the bible. I hear he keeps his weed in leviticus.
Obama's speech on in 9 mins. Me in the shower now. Naked. Make your choice.
I'm bringing the tv in with me.
This text constitutes a formal request for sexual congress under the terms of our Relationship Agreement.
He asked me what I wanted for Christmas. I told him an orgasm would be nice.
I have a bunch of bug bites on my ass... This is why you don't have sex against a tree in the woods
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
I peed in my closet, which at the time looked like a sparkly bathroom...
My psychiatrist just sent me a dick pic
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