You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
She highfived me after i yelled "I'm the clit-commander!" when i came. kevin smith fan and clearly a keeper
i really did not know you could catch crabs from a sofa until now
I am sitting on my kitchen floor drunk with a bottle of jose cuervo, tryin to make cinnamon rolls and write a paper. I love college
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
a search helicopter?!
In hindsight, buying 4 different kinds of vibrators at once may have been a little overenthusiastic of me.
on the way to the hospital you kept asking if we could stop at the bar first. then you proceeded to puke out the window
I took my shirt off and stood in the kitchen for an hour and a half talking to his parents about my tattoos
Right, well, that begs the question of where did you get the whip, why are you using it, and why don't you carry one around more often?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I want to figure out a way to work "if you suddenly die, I might turn into an extreme hoarders" into my valentines day poem
Safe to say I relapsed into my old chatroulette drunk flashing days.
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
the second she challenged me to mario kart drinking game i knew i was in love
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
It does not feel like it was just this morning that I had a penis in multiple cavities of my body
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