Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
There were 3 chicks in my bed I didn't know when I got home. Now I know all of them. Biblically.
Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
I had a dream that our used condom started talking to me. I told me that I did an amazing job, and told me that it saved me. From aids.
Just blew a perc off the traytable on my flight, spring break has begun!!
I'm such a fucking super-fan. I was worried his cum would wash away his autograph.
you really need to stop getting laid in my dreams more than i do.
if i ever get hit by a car or something and become paralyzed promise me youll still be here to hand feed me shots and light my bowls please
I heard you coughing. Are you choking or smoking? And are you okay?
Is it unethical to trim my bush hair with the scissors from my office?
We got a lap dance! I touched a boob!
Nothing like the judgmental looks you get in the bathroom when you still have last night's glowsticks on
You got banned for life from a $30 a night motel. What are you doing with your life?
There's a guy running dressed as a bunny toward your house.
Randomize
