Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
What kind of flower means "I want to have unprotected sex with you, preferably from behind?" because thats the message I'd really like to send on Valentines Day
A guy just tried to send me a pic of his penis & my phone sent me a disclaimer saying "the components were unsuitable for your terminal"
Even your phone knows you shouldn't sleep with him...
I mean, keeping the tube socks on AND taking cell phone pictures that he didn't ask for during sex? that's two strikes kiddo.
You don't have to be drunk! I've licked your asshole before
I can't believe you just became a stipulation in their divorce papers.
YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL.
Yeah, but he has adorable dimples and dimples talk me into things.
I figured you were on something. You're way too happy right now to be sober
HOW CAN YOU EXPECT ME TO KEEP YOUR SECRETS IF YOU KEEP ON TELLING ME THEM.
I should not be able to sum up my life with a taco brand motto...
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
Your vagina is not a steamboat from the 1800's
Jesus Christ, it's not like going swimming. You don't have to wait 20 minutes after you eat to suck a dick
She was crying and pulled the collar of her shirt up to blot the tears. And then she just kept her head there. And stopped crying. "My boobs are just too amazing for me to cry." her words not mine please help she's still in that position
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