They have a pepper shaker for pot.
I woke up and we were making out. So the good news is that after two years off the market, I haven't lost a step. I'm picking up girls in my sleep now.
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
i realized really quickly that drinking a bottle of vodka and 3 crystal light packets wasn't the best idea i've ever had
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
You said your face felt like it was made out out of boxes and kept asking me to give you a bath.
Nothing quite like coming out of an alcohol induced blackout walking down Spruill Avenue carrying a silver briefcase full of IT tools you don't know where they came from. This is my life.
How bad is the voicemail?
You graded my boobs.... C minus. Asshole.
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
So my nipple piercings were only $20 because it's breast cancer awareness month. Fuck yes!
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
He's like a computer from 2001 in a 2014 world. It just doesn't work. Lots of glitches.
Mom is talking about dicks with her friends in the living room. I am 5 seconds away from scaling the bathroom window out of here.
You don't come back from leaving a bag of shit on someone's counter Jill
she brought her phone charger to the bar this bitch is ready to drink
Randomize
