Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
The dentist just called my mother to confirm the appointment that I made on his answering machine at 4:33 am this morning..
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
he met me at the airport with a welcome home sign with a grilled cheese, PBR and a blow job on it. i missed america.
The extent of my physical activity is running from the cops.
Pissed along side the highway while waving at all the traffic... if thats not a sign of a productive night to come then idk what is
Bro... You handed me an ice cube from your drink and said "tell me if it tastes like pickles".
Drunk me spoon fed everyone baby food last night.
I need Jameson.
Yea? How do you think I feel? Your job during the delivery is to keep that flask ready. The moment our kid pops out, I'm taking a shot.
We need a full length mirror. I just ate it trying to look at my shoes on the toilet. But aside from a arm bruise I'm good to go
Don't forget Giraffe in your car! If we show up in the same outfit without animal heads we're just gonna look weird.
You pretended to be Borat in that weird slingshot bathing suit and then proceeded to send another dick pic/nude selfie and said you weren't naked because you were wearing a hat.
The date did not go well. Turns out I once set her brother on fire.
You were arrested in a tiara again... maybe you shouldn’t wear one.
Randomize
