if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
its time to go be "that drunk guy nobody knows"....again.
I used a physics textbook to prop her up so she wouldn't choke on her vomit...see I have learned something from statics class.
For future reference, never invite the people you met at Dunkin Donuts at 2am to your house to watch Dogma
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
Apparently I made a stripper cry last night when I paid her $10 to go away
I just don't know the best way to tell him I think I saw him in a porn. I mean I got off to it, isn't there some level of awkwardness there?
i accidentally sent all my draft messages..how do i do damage control for the multiple "fuck me now" type msgs sent at ten am?
A warmed up burrito and jelly beans. The breakfast of champions.
Just laying in bed, snuggling my cat, and pondering whether I'd like to attend a swingers party this evening...
Well, I got drunk and told my family about what I expected sexually after a good first date.
Hey did you take a shower last night at like 4am?
"ummm...." (Thinking in my head) wet towel, soaking wet hair, clean pjs on backwards... "that would make more sense then what I thought happened..."
No, it's okay that he's on a date. I attach no more emotion to him than I do my vibrator.
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