i think i may have caused an international incident at the french embassy, just fyi
hahaha how?
its a long story involving a horse trailer and some shrubbery
She made fun of how I walked so I announced to her boyfriend that I have cum on her face before.
I woke up with a black eye and dim memories of announcing that i had super powers. I shoved my pockets full of canned tuna and tried to jump off the balcony. And then my boyfriend called the cops.
so you're not coming in to work today?
I wont touch it. I promise i wont touch it. JUST GET UNDER THE DAMN TABLE PLEASE.
Yes. It's so easy to pack to leave when you've thrown away half your clothing cause it smells like vomit.
I may do that, fyi I'm even more sore than I was yesterday. It's like the ghost of your dick is still inside me.
I jerked off enough times today to safely commit to the fact that im not getting laid tonight
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
For my birthday I want you to get me in bed with Donald Trump. That is all. You have 3 months
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
He made me choke him and call him Papi..so all in all a good night.
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
Randomize