Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(410): View more from Maryland

Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night

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(410): Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night http://tfl.nu/ayrv

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(303): View more from Colorado

i make out with random ppl when i drink he shouldnt feel special

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(303): i make out with random ppl when i drink he shouldnt feel special http://tfl.nu/5558

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(301): View more from Maryland

why are there beer bottles in my dishwasher?

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(301): why are there beer bottles in my dishwasher? http://tfl.nu/k3ff

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(304): View more from West Virginia

But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game

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(304): But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game http://tfl.nu/osln

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(740): View more from Ohio

I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream

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(740): I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream http://tfl.nu/eta2

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(704): View more from North Carolina

Do you think it would be a good idea to mention in my admissions essay that I was the guy that streaked across the soccer field last year?

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(704): Do you think it would be a good idea to mention in my admissions essay that I was the guy that streaked across the soccer field last year? http://tfl.nu/w9x5

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(918): View more from Oklahoma

Either he was jacking off or having a seizure next to me in bed. Either way, I was too lazy to help.

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(918): Either he was jacking off or having a seizure next to me in bed. Either way, I was too lazy to help. http://tfl.nu/4c79

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(865): View more from Tennessee

Looking for the remote in the couch. Finding Adderall beads. Considering utilizing.

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(865): Looking for the remote in the couch. Finding Adderall beads. Considering utilizing. http://tfl.nu/w2oe

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(770): View more from Georgia

She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.

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(770): She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40. http://tfl.nu/qfdq

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(403): View more from Alberta, CA

Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.

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(403): Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out. http://tfl.nu/zi3g

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(907): View more from Alaska

I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him

(307): View more from Wyoming

Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere

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(907): I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him (307): Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere http://tfl.nu/182x

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(415): View more from California

also, the amount of semen in my carpet right now is unforgivable...

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(415): also, the amount of semen in my carpet right now is unforgivable... http://tfl.nu/fb10

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(405): View more from Oklahoma

I let him do a line off my nipple in exchange for his prescription pain pills. I feel like 3/4 Vegas stripper, 1/4 underbelly of society.

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(405): I let him do a line off my nipple in exchange for his prescription pain pills. I feel like 3/4 Vegas stripper, 1/4 underbelly of society. http://tfl.nu/cbw1

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(510): View more from California

Some people say 6pm is too early to get drunk. To them I say this dinner is delicious.

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(510): Some people say 6pm is too early to get drunk. To them I say this dinner is delicious. http://tfl.nu/ftps

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(423): View more from Tennessee

True friends don't judge, they just try to have more booty calls than you do.

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(423): True friends don't judge, they just try to have more booty calls than you do. http://tfl.nu/f7pn

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