Texts From Last Night

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  (415): View more from California

  shit! I think I may have lost something in your car. Look for anything that can possibly belong to me, especially look out for a pair of pink panties in a ziplock. I lost my spare and you better find it before someone else does.

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  (415): shit! I think I may have lost something in your car. Look for anything that can possibly belong to me, especially look out for a pair of pink panties in a ziplock. I lost my spare and you better find it before someone else does. http://tfl.nu/rw4v
  Replies (3) Good night (797) Bad night (937)
• Favorite

  (205): View more from Alabama

  I just wish we had the ability to download food from our TVs.

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  (205): I just wish we had the ability to download food from our TVs. http://tfl.nu/uuhy
  Replies (10) Good night (1638) Bad night (524)
• Favorite

  (203): View more from Connecticut

  it tastes like there's a party in my mouth and everyone is throwing up

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  (203): it tastes like there's a party in my mouth and everyone is throwing up http://tfl.nu/co6p
  Replies (64) Good night (622) Bad night (3577)
• Favorite

  (304): View more from West Virginia

  apparently smacking a customer in the face with his iPhone was not part of the WOW factor we learned in training...

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  (304): apparently smacking a customer in the face with his iPhone was not part of the WOW factor we learned in training... http://tfl.nu/a5eu
  Replies (36) Good night (4157) Bad night (736)
• Favorite

  (516): View more from New York

  im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test

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  (516): im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test http://tfl.nu/0qhc
  Replies (79) Good night (52798) Bad night (2279)
• Favorite

  (714): View more from California

  Sometimes I worry for your future but then I remember how big your boobs are.

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  (714): Sometimes I worry for your future but then I remember how big your boobs are. http://tfl.nu/u4g1
  Replies (21) Good night (7528) Bad night (1232)
• Favorite

  (917): View more from New York City

  Her birthday cake consisted of a shot of tequila with a candle in it

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  (917): Her birthday cake consisted of a shot of tequila with a candle in it http://tfl.nu/sdds
  Replies (14) Good night (5711) Bad night (968)
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  (613): View more from Ontario

  Good to know: if a hot girls asks to go back to my place, she probably just needs to vomit all over my bathroom

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  (613): Good to know: if a hot girls asks to go back to my place, she probably just needs to vomit all over my bathroom http://tfl.nu/tl5f
  Replies (13) Good night (910) Bad night (5057)
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  (401): View more from Rhode Island

  Kill yourself wednesday started off with a bang, and im pretty sure im still drunk from tequila tuesday.

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  (401): Kill yourself wednesday started off with a bang, and im pretty sure im still drunk from tequila tuesday. http://tfl.nu/wqr0
  Replies (6) Good night (2951) Bad night (895)
• Favorite

  (217): View more from Illinois

  Do you have any idea how hard it is to concentrate on legal issues with the ghost of his giant penis in me?

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  (217): Do you have any idea how hard it is to concentrate on legal issues with the ghost of his giant penis in me? http://tfl.nu/r928
  Replies (9) Good night (2744) Bad night (804)
• Favorite

  (510): View more from California

  This girl has a mullet weave. I missed oakland.

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  (510): This girl has a mullet weave. I missed oakland. http://tfl.nu/6qxu
  Replies (7) Good night (818) Bad night (1190)
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  (731): View more from Tennessee

  There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?

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  (731): There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight? http://tfl.nu/39pd
  Replies (8) Good night (1628) Bad night (491)
• Favorite

  (562): View more from California

  Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook

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  (562): Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook http://tfl.nu/7qsk
  Replies (6) Good night (1272) Bad night (396)
• Favorite

  (816): View more from Missouri

  Just saw you in traffic. You may have noticed me, I was the corpse driving the white car.

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  (816): Just saw you in traffic. You may have noticed me, I was the corpse driving the white car. http://tfl.nu/sqkm
  Replies (2) Good night (853) Bad night (455)
• Favorite

  (602): View more from Arizona

  Until you can top getting paid to have women tell you to check out their ass, my job will remain better than yours

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  (602): Until you can top getting paid to have women tell you to check out their ass, my job will remain better than yours http://tfl.nu/swqx
  Replies (2) Good night (757) Bad night (262)

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