did we hook up?
no, because you kept repeating "itty bitty titties" when i took off my shirt
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
We shared that special kind of eye contact that can only be experienced when you know one party is saying "Oh god, I fucked him in the back seat when you were in the front, didn't I."
Before we started fucking, he laid me on the bed, and asked my what my sleep number was, so that i would be "comfy"
He's had mdma poured down his throat. He's getting huggy.
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
On a scale of 1 to "bad descision", where does stealing my racist neighbors dog and giving him my roomates dildo for a chew toy rate?
Unless you've also woken up wearing a poncho and a ring pop, I suggest you don't judge me. Okay, I even judged myself for that.
This is going to ruin my future wedding planner career, but isn't it better the groom knows he's gay BEFORE he gets married?
I had a dream about a vibrator with 42 different settings. If that's not a good indication I need to get laid, I don't know what is
He keeps bees of course he's weird
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
Dude. I need you to practice dancing around in your banana hamock. Party boy style. I'll call later with details.
He wants to buy me a wedding ring and pretend to be married to someone else when we fuck. It actually makes me wet thinking about it.
...I just melted into my bed. I am one with the bed. I am 600 thread count.
Randomize
