Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
u know u need to get laid when watching mike wazowskis gf from monsters inc makes u horny
Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
Dude I just heard my boss singing from the bathroom "I love making poop"
Did you just see the Batmobile???
my mom hid the smirnoff from me. this is the most fucked up game of hide and seek EVER
I guess we had a small kitchen fire somehow when we decided to bake fruitroll ups and croutons...
Hm, finding a time when my drinking and your real life don't conflict could be difficult
I'm having a really difficult time dealing with the fact that my dog now shares a name with Snooki's crotch-spawn.
Marshall is naming all the elements of my face. I love science nerds.
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
You screamed at oncoming traffic , "five dollars to punch this guy in taint!".
if i do community service solely to impress a guy, everyone wins, right?
except your soul
what's your room number? I've never been there sober...
I can't decide if I miss drinking or you, they are so closely connected.
Randomize
