I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
I can only name 15 people I've had sex with - can I just start claiming that as my sex number?
he just tried to lick my eyebrow. thats the deal breaker.
Haha im sorry. Its just financially responsiable to bang him instead of you right now.
Dude. I have been looking at your movie history on netflix and it is like looking at the rings of a tree. Only instead of telling me how old you are, it tells me when you were stoned.
He put up a Facebook album attempting to sell off their Harvard furniture. Items for sale include: his friend, a broken lamp, an item described as a 'carpet and/or sleeping bag', a pair of paint stained cargo pants, size 'Tyler', and a self proclaimed $3 bottle of wine, which he is offering for $2
He's freaking out just because my cat licked his balls while he was fucking me
I may hire someone just to sell my family the drugs they keep asking me for. It's cutting into my doing drugs time.
But I just had this pork pâté. It was dick grabbing.
I knew us throwing ourselves at him back in the day would pay off. I'm gonna b a divorcees rebound. Score!
of course we called 911. an innocent mans booze was at steak
It's accurate though. I am legitimately passionate about pickles. I crave pickles the same way I crave sex. It is a deep rooted animalistic need
Your friend gave me you're number. I was the guy locked behind the book shelf.
I think you have the wrong number, but I hope you escaped your library-prison?
I don't think he understands that his kid doesn't bother me. I have a binder full of developmentally appropriate early childhood activities.
Either go for divorced men who are forty plus or stop doing this immediately. You are 23 years old. You need more wine and less baby fever
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
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