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If my vag had twitter, what do you think it would say?
Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
Just did a line with a monopoly bill. Tell me I'm not fancy.
My cousin just asked what abortion is. Happy Holidays.
we've decided whoever is stupid enough to use the condom that's tacked to the wall deserves to get pregnant.
She tried to leave the threesome and I heard you yell "Hey! We don't quit at halftime!"
You told her that she shouldn't be allowed to wear clothes then when her roommate asked if you like her you said "no I just want to insert things into her"
I stand by it.
GETTING HORNY AT RANDOM IS REALLY FUCKING INCONSIDERATE.
Just got a snapchat from him that was a video of with the caption "my new apartment" in Brazil. I think we might not be seeing eachother anymore.
Business idea: assless chaps for toddlers. I'm high.
Dude, I wish I could live my entire life blacked out.
She's licking the vodka she spilled off the desk
Aaaaand now she's drinking it out of the shot glass like a cat
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
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