ha- omfg whatt the fuck is wrong w me. Alcohol+third cousins= bad decisions
i just spent the last half hour thinking about my totally irrational and intense hatred of wedge flip flops.
I just want to make mistakes. Like stds that go away with antibiotics mistakes.
I kinda volunteered your dick to help her deal with her virginity issues. Figured you wouldn't mind.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She made a roadhead CD. Can I marry her?
You told her that she shouldn't be allowed to wear clothes then when her roommate asked if you like her you said "no I just want to insert things into her"
I stand by it.
Try to make ecstasy cheese. Capitalize on the molly and greek yogurt trends. MARKETING
i want to live in a society where a 20 year old can wear pigtails and not get them called handlebars, because i look fucking adorable in them.
I guess "Ass Fun Friday" is not a thing no matter how many times I say it or bring it up in conversation...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Stoned stonnnnnnned on the raaaaange
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
Alright I'd bang a 4 sober, It's been like 3-4 weeks or how ever long 4th of July was ago. I wanna fuck something.
4th of July was 12 days ago. The date is literally in the text you just sent.
I don't care about the dates I just wanna bone something.
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
He was a foot taller than me and my hands were bigger than his, it's called Pity head
idk but im stoned n hiding in the bathroom from my kids with a really big bowl of really little candy bars
Randomize
