i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
I'm at the gas station where we got beef jerky and condoms. The fact that those two are in the same sentence makes me love you more.
It was so weird. I had like an out of body experience. I heard the moaning, but I didn't know it was me.
we should hire that guy that makes pancakes that we met last weekend for our next party. He can feed us, and regulate!
He got me coffee AND filled up my gas tank. He must've fucked another girl in my car..
Well for starters the people who just made my burger at the grab and go just told me to "hang in there"
I just rolled an Obama blunt and a Romney shame joint for tonight. Vote wisely.
Dude. I might have just seen some porn i wasnt ready to see. The chicks were so old.
Also, in the middle of me riding him, he said "I want you to dance on my dick" like I was supposed to know what that means
I need to pay that drinking in public ticket, but I also really want to get a spray tan next week... so priorities.
He was like, I wanna take it slow. I took off my bra And I was like, either we have sex now or you get out.
I am having telepathic thoughts with my cat. He loves me and wants me to blow his nose
SCUSE ME I KNOW YOU DIDNT DO THAT MUCH COKE IN 10 MINUTES
You walked right into the door. Even the door guy and security guys were laughing.
Randomize
