Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.
But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
You probably havent been upstairs if you think that the microwave missing its door is bad
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
I just realized i came back home with my lei that one night. How do i forget my bra but remember my lei?
The cab driver had me sign for the payment and I was like give me a second while I throw up right outside your door.
No dude trust me, just go a strip club at their busiest hours and pick the ugliest chick. Guaranteed she blows you for under 20$, the record stands at $7.67 and a pen from Bank of America,
When I was with you my penis felt like a fat woman crammed into a pair of lulu lemons
Yeah. I've decided no relationship can survive me shoving my boobs in the guys face
Jazzercise themed birthday pub crawl. 6 bars in 6 hours.everyone was a hot mess.
I cannot even describe to you the most amazing ass I have ever had the pleasure of seeing walk up the stairs in front of me just now.
I just got the two most enjoyable things in life in one... Weed delivered in bubble wrap.
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
I just bought condoms and a potted plant, making for a top ten super weird and awkward purchase.
Randomize
