I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
I wish I had more reasons to start sentences with the phrase, "Here's the thing you've got to remember about cougars ...
Dating my ex's drug dealer.. best. revenge. ever.
I need Christmas break to be over. I'm tired of fucking my old High School girlfriends
next time the cops show up in riot gear we should probably leave
and miss being on the news....no way
Had a couple pieces of pizza for breakfast...suck on that Jamie Oliver.
he sent me a winky sad face. i cannot deal this level of pathetically needy flirtatiousness.
I'm drinking red wine & feeding anchovies to the dog. I'm really not picky about what kinda of company I'm in.
Phone sex soon? I mean date. Sex date. Date phone.
all 3? possibly?
I think I'm up to the challenge.
I'm hurting so bad I actially had to wait for my mini wheats to get soggy before I could eat them..
You fell asleep mid blowjob with my vibrator in your HAND. So no, I will not bring you pizza.
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
Well, he kept asking me if I was going to murder him once we got upstairs. It sort of killed the mood.
i don't know what happened one minute im stumbling home drunk and the next im drinking pabst and smoking with a french guy ive never met named hugo.
Randomize
