She said her name was "party"
69 is so not fun when his penis is sporting a 70s hairstyle
Please stop bringing your one night stands to Sunday brunch.
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
the trail of clothing leading from the bed to the door was in the exact order i needed to put them on. underwear near the bed shoes by the door.
i don't know at this point bringing the fog horn might be a good idea...
apparently he's bringing me two things i like. he said one was him and i'm assuming the other one is his penis
Its... i dont even know. theres lots of rap music and i cant find my shoes
This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it
Woke up backwards on a recliner
Everyone thinks I'm sleeping but I'm actually just melting.
I need to start a penis folder so I stop "accidentally" showing people my junk. On a side note- St. Pattys penis was a hit, four leaf clover and all.
That last one reminds me of the time we smoked that foot-long joint and by the time we'd finished we were so stoned we applauded it.
On a scale of "huh, that's interesting" to "holy porn stars, batman". How good?
Definitely closer to "holy porn stars, batman".
Do you remember trying to sleep under the pool table while wearing a reflective vest?
Nope.
You kept saying you had to be safe.
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