Your date looks like the Cloverfield monster. good luck.
Hi, my name's audrey!
Max?
Sorry, this girl is phone-stealing drunk.
I can't believe I'm wasting this thong on a guy in a sweater vest.
he woke up with $200 in his pocket and had to buy his cell phone back from a hobo at the bus stop.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
You did a strip tease for the toilet.
I give him a gold star every time I orgasm. His room looks like he's freaking King Midas.
you're going to have to hot glue me into my dress tonight. there's no way out.
he made me feel like a shish kabob. his dick was the skewer.
and you said he wasn't worth calling.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We've been here for ten minutes. She told me I wasn't "Irish enough", licked my tits, and then sprinkled green glitter on them.
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
There's a kitten on my face and I'm druuuunk
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
Okay penises are actually pretty exciting. The people attached to them are an entirely different story
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
Randomize