After work we went home to fool around. Turns out he had sawdust under his foreskin. I'm never going down on him again.
There is a contact in my phone named "Bar Mcntysu." this is why we need a third person to go out with us.
Just smoked out of an apple with Steve Jobs. I love Halloween.
I'm doing homework tonight but if you end up going out drinking I would like one courtesy peer pressure text.
This bowl of cereal would be the size of a giant's bowl-piece. It's. that. big.
How much did you smoke??
oh sorry. I thought "boat" was code for "penis"
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
Hamster emergency. Can u come in here
FUCK... Pulled a chick from the bar went to her house passed out on the shitter. She lives in a house full of girls. They were making poop jokes as i left
it's ok my mom asked me why i had a guys shirt on and also why there was chocolate all over my bra
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
You squatted and peed on the living room floor while maintaining eye contact with Sebastian
i'm not sure you can trust me in a car with 20 dozen donuts
Talk shit all you want but with my new knife sharpener I have a lethal razor sharp pizza cutter. Fuck with me Mario I dare you!
Randomize
