Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
Moan for me like Helen Keller
Note to Self: No matter how horny, turned on or in the moment you are, never go down on your gf after she had soccer practice.
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
The bartender let me pay my bar tab with my itunes giftcards.
I don't call you at 3 in the morning to start a fucking relationship.
I interrupted her conversation with, "are we gonna fuck yet?" and she immediately got naked. thanks for the blind date
We had unprotected sex and she's eating life cereal for breakfast. The universe is telling me get the plan b for her
I started making my dollar bills into rings for the strippers
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
That's the point of day drinking, get fucked up by 6pm so you can get stuff done the next day. It's the adult thing to do.
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
I kept having to give myself encouraging advice like, "you know how a path works"
WHY DID YOU DRUNK DIAL MY MOM?!
Because mine was sitting on the bar stool next to me...
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.