no more stoned jack in the box. this is the third night in a row.
Do you ever close your eyes when your having sex with your girlfriend and pretend she didn't get fat after high school?
don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
Just bought plan B with a coupon. Told the pharmacist I like to keep it classy.
Every day you talk to me ... I literally love you more..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
I think i found piece of your tooth in my dick this morning when i took a shower
She just called to say she can support a full bottle of vodka between "the girls" now. I'm going over, don't try and stop me.
We're gonna take a moment of silence to pray... that his penis is as pretty and as talented as his brothers.
Yeah. I realized I have a weakness for drugs and I need to move somewhere where I don't know how to find them.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't underestimate her when she starts going by "the vodka queen"
What's the standard Christmas present for six months of booty calls?
Mobile recharge?
People...there is no better feeling in the world than finding out via Google that your ex has a warrant out for his arrest. No better feeling.
It started with a wedding, followed by a drag show, and ended with Trevor getting punched in the face by the bouncer. How was your weekend?
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
She gave me a roadie as we drove home from fireworks. People were still lighting off their displays as we drove by. I love America.
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