How long do you think herpes can live on chapstick?
I would kick you in the vagina but I'm afraid I would lose my shoe.
I'm sooo using this pickup line: "Baby, its not the 2.5 inches... Its the 200 pounds behind it"
Unmistakable female orgasm noises coming from upstairs shower
She must've brought a toy -- seriously doubt that he's up to the task
I am officially superior to you. I said "Go Go Gadget Dick" before I fucked her. I dare you to beat that.
$1 pitcher night should be outlawed.
so this guy comes in from the patio covered in puke and says "we gotta go"...Yup u need to go is an understatement
just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
only 75% of american men are circumcised...i guess this was bound to happen to me someday.
so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
You thought last year was bad... a guy dressed as a clown showed up with cocaine
It's like all my brain cells are screaming at me.
I'm dying.
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
Mom kept me on a leash as a kid, did you know this?
When she went in the beer store I got to hold it.
not sure what the chiropractor did but my junk deserves a cape now.
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