worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
Our house smells like week old pizza, beer cans, cigarettes, and depressing career tracks....get lysol.
I would dunk an oreo in her breast milk
Pick my eyebrow is burning. I'm sitting in the back of dolows vat and listening to jolly music and wilfgang is signing and looking food. Cute kid. Home is where I go now.
what. the. fuck.
Vodka and Eggs at 9:30AM = thank you, America.
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
There's some drunk girl alone in the field, she looks like she could use some help.
Also it's only fair that you know that that girl is me.
That's what you get for drunk dialing me to ask what kind of flowers I like while outside of a strip club, after telling me you "made it rain"
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
My fuck buddy is great and all, but it gets weird when she gets in arguments with her BF in the driveway
I actually haven't slept with anyone in a while. I think my whore phase is just seasonal.
We had sex on the playground and then walked around his neighborhood grading houses based on their Christmas decorations
Drunk me also decided it would be funny to change all the passwords on my computer last night. Now I can't log into anything.
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
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