when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
oddly enough my penis is pretty tan. the part of my body that gets the least amount of sunlight is tanner than most of the rest of my body.
I think its part of male evolution. Pretty soon they'll have diamonds on them and taste like chocolate.
Balls are like the throw pillows of the penis
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
Dude, I don't care how big her tits are. I have to dump her. She shit in my shower.
I just met his wife...she told me they have been having marriage problems and are spending his paychecks on marriage counseling...then she cried on my shoulder...NOW i feel like a bitch.
If i apologize for punching you in the liver repeatedly will you explain where the grass stains on my shoulders came from?
Reached a new low. Drinking Wine from my thermos while on the stair master.
i think we watched the dark knight rises after you left but i might have passed out through most of it. I remember crying at the end though. sad tears then happy tears.
Wedding party came into the bar an hour ago. Mother of the bride is a stage five clinger. send help.
He's so sweet...I can't see him enjoying that I got injured during sex.
What the fuck happened last night.... I woke up with a bowl half full of ravioli next to my head, reversed on my bed still fully clothed.....
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
I’m sorry, some of us common-folk don’t have access to steady dick
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